november 3 2024

At midnight, my lover fucks me so good, my whole body sings and I descend into a deep sleep. 

I have a dream I am driving across the country. I’m in a little jalopy of a vehicle - dark green just like my first car, the one I had when I lived in Vancouver. I loved that car. It gave me sovereignty. I sold it to a junkyard when I left the city.

In my dream, I’m loosely gripping the steering wheel and staring down the barrel of an open highway. It’s dusk and the stars are all out. I can’t look in any direction but forward. I can’t see anything but concrete and twinkling horizon. The windows are rolled down and I can feel the wind on my face. No tears. No fear. The chord progression of “No Child Left Behind” by Kanye West starts booming from the speakers. It loops and echoes all over this glimmering dome and I have the sense that I am headed to a point in time, not in space.

I lean my head back and look to where the rearview mirror should be but there isn’t one. A brown tipped feather hangs in its place. I hit the gas pedal as hard as I can and reach for it. The car engine starts to sound like a herd of wild horses. I’m flying. I wake up.